Painting the research

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Menopause alters mood, body, and identity. 

Change without instruction.

Out of Sync reflects the uncertainty of menopause that feels sudden, unexplained, and deeply personal, leaving a sense of vulnerability and quiet grief for the familiar self.

A signature repeated, but never quite right.

The hand remembers before the mind does.

Memory loosens its hold.

Marks falter, restart, and fade.

Signed by Dementia reflects memory loss and frustration, as identity fades through the inability to complete a name once written without thought.

Anger hums beneath the surface, sudden and unexplained. 

The irritation comes without reason, sharp and sudden.

Thoughts buzz, patience thins, reactions feel impulsive. 

Temporal captures the mental buzz of menopause, where irritation feels impulsive, difficult to control, and the struggle to explain feelings that appear without clear cause.

Anger in perimenopause doesn't hold still. It arrives in bursts, settles, returns — and through all of it women keep their own insight intact. I painted it horizontally because it moves through time rather than being a state you sit inside."

 Edges blur, strength fades.

Time changes both body and mind. 

The quiet persistence of a self that continues, changed but present.

Worn Soft reflects emotional fatigue, tenderness, and the strength of continuing despite wear.

 Disorder without disruption.

No visible chaos, just constant noise. 

Thoughts repeat, overlap, and refuse to settle.

Quiet Disorder reflects invisible mental health struggles where noise exists internally, where control masks struggle, and where silence does not equal peace.

 The quiet exhaustion of constant control. 

Coping becomes harder with age and mental illness.

Vulnerability replaces sharpness, and endurance becomes quiet.

Holding It Together speaks to the quiet fatigue of holding on, and the fragile balance between coping and collapse.

The quiet grief of no longer feeling whole.

The quiet fear of pieces of self slipping away without warning.

Memory slips, thoughts scatter, and reality feels less steady.

Falling Out of Place speaks to losing parts of yourself and the quiet confusion of not fully recognising who you are becoming.

Nothing happened today. And yet, everything is changing.

Quiet loss and erosion over time.

What appears unchanged carries the quiet accumulation of time - wear, fatigue, and the slow erosion of self; shaped by aging, menopause, and mental load.